Yesterday I realized that I've really settled in. The realization was triggered when I found myself dancing the polka in the kitchen with one of my roommates and enthusiastically belting out "I've Got the Joy, Joy, Joy, Joy" at the same time. God is so good to me. He's given me rest in so many ways; sometimes I feel guilty because of the absurd abundance in my life. I hope that this stage is preparation for something; I pray that at some point in my life I'll serve a purpose other than to sit around, study, and attempt to entertain Kim. The question I have to ask is this: is it wrong for me to enjoy life so much? Am I culpable for having such an easy time of it? Is the lack of strife in my life a sign of God's blessing or a sign that I'm simply not encountering reality? Is it possible to be at rest without being complacent?
I suspect that the work will start building up in about two weeks and I won't have time to ask these questions anymore, so if you've got any answers, hit me quick.
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2 comments:
I'm certainly not wisdom personified, but I felt the exact same strange guilt when I had just started with SAI and was dating the guy downstairs and life was just generally quite good. I think it's cause life rarely "feels" good, so when it does, we think we're doing something wrong. But that's just it...it rarely feels that good, so it's important to soak in this time and not feel like a sinner for thanking God for a momentarily smooth path. If He really thought you needed it, He'd throw something tough or annoying in there.
Thanks, luv. You light up my life. I always appreciate your wisdom so much. I'll be calling this weekend to see how a certain event went down... til then, adieu!
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